THE THINGS MEN DO: Chapter 1 – 4

“I didn’t mean anything, Ann. I just want you to look as
pretty as you always look.”
“Some husbands don’t even notice what their wives are
wearing. I’m flattered, Harry.”
“I don’t know about that.” I bent and kssed her. “See you
in a little while. I’m just checking the ledger.”
“Found any mistakes?”

Ann kept the books, looked after the insurance stamps
and the rest of the inevitable forms. Once a month I checked
everything, just to be on the safe side.

“Everything’s perfect.” I gave her a light slap on her
behind. “And get out of those pants. They’re indecent.”
“Only you see me in them.” She looked down at them
with a comic expression of dismay. “Well, all right I’ll find something else. Harry, I suppose we couldn’t run to a new pair? They do save my stockings.”

Gloria’s five pound note was burning in my pocket. I took
it out, knowing that I wouldn’t feel so guilty about her if I spent the money on Ann.

“Get a new pair. I’ve hired space in the garage for a car.
This is part of a month’s payment. Go ahead and get them.”

Ann’s eyes opened wide.
“Oh no. I was only joking. We can’t afford to buy clothes
just yet, Harry. We owe . . .”

“Never mind what we owe. This is something out of the
blue. I’m not putting it through the books. Go ahead and get them. Get them tomorrow.”
“But we must be sensible . . .”
“Oh, for God’s sake! Don’t argue! Get them!”

I shoved the note into her hand and went downstairs.
For some minutes I sat at my desk, feeling hot and
irritable and a little sick. I never shouted at Ann before. I have never criticized her before.

I could still see her startled, hurt expression as I left her. I thought of how Gloria and I had stood like conspirators when we had heard Ann’s voice. The writing was on the wall. This had got to stop.

When Gloria, came with her car I’d tell her I’d changed my mind. If she garaged her car here, I’d be seeing her often. I remembered the look she had given me when she had flicked away that imaginary speck of fluff. Women don’t look like that unless they mean trouble. I felt something cold and wet run clown my face.
Just to think of her that way made me sweat.
Tim Greensleeves pushed open the door.

“Will there be anything else, Mr. Collins? I’ve checked
the petrol. There’s enough for this week. If there’s nothing
else, I’ll get off home.”
“That’s okay, Tim.”
He looked at me, a puzzled expression in his eyes.
“Well, good night, Mr. Collins.”
“Good night.”

When he had gone, I got up and put on a white coat just
in case anyone wanted petrol, propped open the office door so
I could keep an eye on the garage and started work on the
ledger again.

I worked half-heartedly for half an hour. My mind wasn’t
concentrating. I tried to keep Gloria out of my thoughts, but
she kept forcing her way in until I tossed down my pencil and pushed back my chair with a grunt of irritation.

I went down the long aisle to the street entrance and
stood for some minutes watching the traffic edge past. The
traffic was heavy all day, and Eagle Street was used as a
backway to Piccadilly, to avoid the traffic lights of Regent
Street.

Across the way was a postal sorting office: two mail vans
were parked in front of the entrance, and postmen were busy
loading sacks of mail into the vans.

I watched them at work without interest then suddenly
spotting Bill Yates as he dumped two mail bags on the
pavement I waved to him.

Bill had been in my battalion during the war. We had
fought together at Caen, had been wounded on the same day,
and had spent a month in the same hospital ward. We had
even been demobilized on the same day, and soon after I had
opened the garage, I had discovered he was one of the
permanent staff at the sorting office, across the road.

He came over, a broad grin on his red, humorous face.
He was a little man, nearing forty, with powerful shoulders and short stocky legs.
“Hello, Harry: how goes it?”
“Pretty much as usual.”
He winked.

“Don’t kid me. Who was that piece I saw come out a
while back? Blimey! She’d got a dairy on her that had me
throwing myself out of the window.”
“She wanted to garage her car here.”

“She did? So I’ll be seeing more of her, shall I? Don’t
often get a chance of studying form down this street. Phew! It’s lucky you’re a respectably married man. Between you and me, Harry, she wouldn’t be safe if she garaged her car with me.”

“Should have thought you had got beyond all that by
now.” I tried to smile, but it didn’t come off. “What are you
looking so pleased about?” I was anxious to change the
subject. “Don’t tell me you’ve got a rise?”
“More than that: promotion. I’m Guard Yates from Monday. No more shoving ruddy bags around.

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