You can’t marry everybody. Some people are suppose to be your friends not your marriage partner. For someone to qualify as your spouse, you must be attracted to them spiritually, socially, emotionally, intellectually, mentally and physically -anything short of that equals marital disaster.
Lots of people are in miserable marriages because they married someone they have no future together with.
I had a good male friend for 10 years. It was a beautiful, pure, platonic relationship. We liked each other, we talked a lot and we respected each other’s core values. That’s where it ends.
There was no chemistry, I wasn’t in love with him and there was no physical attraction. But we had stood by each other through thick and thin. I like standing by people when they are nothing. Then he got a nice job, wanted to settle down, took me out and made his proposal. He felt since I had stood by him all the years he was hustling, I was the best candidate for his marriage but he was wrong! I wasn’t! I wasn’t in love with him and he was not physically attractive to me. Oh, don’t get it wrong, this guy is good looking at 5 feet and several inches tall. Light complexioned, well built, well groomed, smelled nice and some ladies looked at me with envy as he picked me out to spend hours with so I should have counted myself lucky and jumped at the proposal but I could not marry him, he had some flaws I could never cope with and his spiritual life wasn’t just compatible with mine. Yet we liked each other. He was hurt I said NO but I had no regret. I knew I wasn’t what he needed physically and intellectually too so why get married?
When he met the lady he is now married to, I was very happy for him. I knew he was in love. He talked about her with ecstasy, he glowed and shone, was very proud of her and from his doting around her, I knew they were physically attracted to each other. His wife respects him too and she counts herself lucky marrying him. I heaved a sigh of relief!
A successful marriage is beyond physical attraction but you must be FULLY CONVINCED within your spirit you are marrying your God-ordained spouse for your life.
Don’t settle for less out of desperation. Don’t just marry anybody.
I am now blissfully married to the man of my dreams whom I admire and respect a lot. We are all round compatible and have high chemistry for each other. Waiting for God’s will pays. God bless you. FEEL FREE TO SHARE…
© Seun Oladele, repost, 2019
