The Enemies of The Church
Composed and written by Excelrhymez
Aka Mummy E
The marriage was the talk of the Town, food and drinks were just like sand, everyone had more than enough to eat and drink.
Pastor Jim came out and introduced the newly wedded couple to the waiting crowd. He prayed for them and congratulated them then he asked them to step outside so he can bless the marriage and declare them as man and wife.
Vic, Stella and Helen who have been busy taking all the food made available in their bags and gathering drinks quickly sat up.
Vic: The time has come o!
Stella: Yes o, I don’t want to miss any of this moment, I want to be able to give the correct gist when I start telling people about it.
Helen: Before nkor, me am going live on Facebook already.
Helen quickly grabs her phone and set it on, in Facebook live. She made sure to capture every moment of the joining and declaration as husband and wife by Pastor Jim. And then she captioned it, “pastor Weds man with six wives in the house of God”.
Immediately she posted it on Facebook, comments started pouring in.
Vic: (laughing) I’m not surprised at all, this is your work na, Facebook pikin.
Helen: Yes o, this is my work o, I carry the right information, I’m the correct aproko, made to expose the wrong activities of the church to the world.
Vic: you are the correct amebor. So who will expose you when it’s your turn?
Stella: Ah for Vic? I will be live 24hours. She knows how to carry people’s information so I will be the one to carry and post her own.
Vic: na una sabi. As far as I know, there is no skeleton hidden in my cupboard, so I have nothing to fear when you talk of exposure.
Both Stella and Helen burst into a big laugh and Vic began to wonder why they were laughing.
Stella: see you, so you think you are the only one who knows how to peep into other people’s life. Listen even the bible said it that when you point one accusing finger at someone, four other fingers are being pointed at you.
Vic: what do you mean by that?
Stella: oh , so you think we don’t know? Let me tell you, we know everything you are doing with that so called Sister Sheila that calls herself the choir mistress.
Vic:what what are you talking about?
Helen: Oh please cut the crap sis. We are all friends here and we know how to keep our secrets so there is no point lying to us.
Stella: No need o. We even have evidence on phone, if we wanted to blow your covers we would have done that a long time ago. But since you are our friend we are keeping your secret.
Helen: we know you and sister Sheila are practicing les.bianism.
Vic was shocked. She didn’t know anyone knew her secret. She was really embarrassed that her friends caught her in the act. But she was glad it was her friends and not some other persons.
Vic: (shamefully she asks) since when did you find out? And how many people knows about it?
Stella: you don’t have to be ashamed or embarrassed about anything. I don’t know how many persons know about it, but I really don’t think many people know of it. Pastor Jim asked us to call Sister Sheila for him, and we came to call her and we just saw how the two of you were smooching, touching and kissing
Helen: But babe you get heart o, inside the church, you carried your sin into church. We hail you!
The girls burst out laughing and trying to calm their friend who was already scared of being exposed.
Vic: Girls I am really sorry I didn’t tell you, I was too scared. I am not a lesbian, but sister Sheila offered to be giving me 30k monthly and you girls already know I’m a Hustler.
Helen: Babe you don’t mean it. 30k nor be small money o.
Vic: Yes na, that is why I agreed to do it.
Stella: I always knew that there is something about that girl. She doesn’t talk to boys, she hardly even talks to girls. She is always by herself praying or singing. Forming spiritual something.
Vic: Babes that girl spoil nor be small. But my own is to collect my money and just play along. After all I have nothing to lose.
Helen: abi o, babe abeg do your thing jare. But please stop doing it in the church. God go vex for you o.
Stella: apart from that, it’s risky, someone might catch you. You just have to be careful abeg.
Vic: please girls you are my sisters and only friends o, promise me you won’t lick my secret please.
Stella: Habba babes, if we want to spill we would have done that a long time ago. You can trust us. You are safe with us. Abi Helen?
Helen: Yes o, we protect one another okay?
Vic heaved a sigh of relief. She thanked her friends and they continued with the gossip of the marriage. While eating and drinking.
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