When Love Doesn’t Make Sense
Written by Sonia Okehie
Episode 12
Love can be tiring at times, especially when you truly want to be with someone but unfavourable circumstances keeps springing up every single time you want to take a deep breath and enjoy your relationship with that special person. The constant crisis Gary and I faced as a couple was beginning to get on my nerves and actually started to wear me out. For some strange reasons, we have never had a month pass us by without one problem or the other and at that point, I was beginning to get tired.
After the shocking reveal of Gary’s urgent trip back to the states, I was left shattered and devastated not because he was leaving me for a whole two months, but rather because of the major reason he was travelling. The fact that his travel had to do with a lady he dated for over a year was something for me to be greatly bothered about and I didn’t hesitate to show my disapproval to his travel reasons.
“Babe I just don’t know what to say because this whole thing sounds funny to my ears. How do you expect me to feel knowing that while you are away from me, you will be with your Ex partner back in the states. How sure am I that something drastic wouldn’t happen there while you are gone” I sadly said. On the other hand, Gary understood my disapproval towards his urgent trip and tried to make me understand things better. “Babe, I get that you are shocked about this whole situation but I want to assure you that there’s nothing to worry about. Letisha and I are over so there’s nothing to feel threatened about. I promise to try and return earlier before the two months elapses. I love you my darling, be safe while I am gone OK. My house is all yours, stay there and keep it lively while I am gone. I’ll also leave money for you in my drawers, buy whatever you want and don’t miss me too much OK. Love you” he said and I soberly replied “I Love You too.
The call ended afterwards and I sadly laid back on my bed. As I laid down, my heart kept beating fast and my feet suddenly became cold. Lost in thoughts, I didn’t know when tears started dripping off my eyes. “When will I have a break in this relationship? Every time one heartache or the other, I am just tired” I soberly said as I laid on my bed and cuddled my pillow.
Few hours later while at work, I got a call from Gary that his flight was about to leave. I said a little prayer with him and bid him goodbye. After that call, tears clouded my eyes but I tried my best to hold it back because I was in a public space.
After a little while of being sober, I picked up my phone and went to my gallery in search of Gary’s pictures. I endlessly scrolled through his pictures as tears filled my eyes. My heart skipped several beats as I thought of the possibility of something drastic taking place in his homeland.
Deep down, I was low-key scared of the unknown but just had to put myself together and be positive that nothing sad would happen through out the two months Gary would be away. It was a 7 hours long flight so all fingers were crossed as I anticipated his call to inform me that he had arrived safely.
After a sad day at work, I retired home while still anticipating Gary’s call. Unfortunately, he didn’t call that day for reasons unknown. After waiting for a long while, I slept off and hoped that he would call the next day.
Just as expected, a call came in very early the next day and immediately I looked at the unknown number, I could tell it was Gary calling. I quickly answered the call and the first thing I heard was my baby’s nerves calming voice. “My darling, how are you?” Gary happily said and I smiled instantly. “Babe is that you? I’m so happy you got back home safe. I waited all night for your call” I happily said. He explained that he arrived very late and didn’t want to wake me by calling because he knew it was very late in the country I was at. We talked for a long time and tried to catch up on each other’s lives.
That morning, I didn’t want to leave for work and just felt like talking to Gary all day. We spoke for hours and I got prepared to leave the house as we spoke on phone. After a lovely morning well spent talking, we had to end the call because each of us had other important things to attend to.
As I left for work that day, my face was all smiles because everything I was worried and sad about the previous day had somehow vanished. Despite the fact that Gary was still away and was entangled in a situation that involved his Ex, I was relieved and unbothered.
From that day henceforth, Gary and I spoke almost every day. He made sure to call me at least once a day and whenever we spoke on phone, it usually lasted for hours. I didn’t really bother to ask him about Letisha and why his family wanted to meet him because I didn’t want any bad vibes or conversation. However, Gary still told me all that was happening back home that concerned his ex, and to be frank, it wasn’t an issue for me to bother about. Day in Day out, everything went on smoothly till all of a sudden, something was off.
It happened that I couldn’t reach Gary on phone all of a sudden. Initially, it felt like nothing serious but I began to get bothered after I couldn’t reach him for good one week. Each day, I dialed his nunber and also checked his social media accounts but he was totally unreachable. Since I didn’t have his sister’s phone number, I tried to reach her on social media but couldn’t get hold of her.
As things gradually began to escalate, I became overly worried. I remember shedding tears whenever I remembered that I hadn’t spoken to Gary in almost 3 weeks. At that moment, so many scary thoughts were in my mind. A part of me felt something bad had happened to him, while another part of me felt he had abandoned our relationship and probably played me.
In all these scary thoughts, the fact that Gary gave me full custody of his house and two cars somehow assured me that he hadn’t abandoned our relationship because if he planned on doing something like that, then he wouldn’t have given me such custody of his valuable properties. I just felt something bad had happened; I could feel it deep down in my guts but couldn’t wrap my head around it.
A full month passed and I hadn’t heard from Gary. I honestly can’t remember how many times I cried, prayed and hoped that my phone would ring and it will be my baby calling but that mustard-seed hope always came crushing. At that period, I was emotionally drained and was always absent-minded. So many people noticed that something was wrong with me because of the way I looked stressed, drained and shattered. Nothing made sense anymore to me because a huge part of my heart was nowhere to be found. After a month of being devastated, something more devastating occurred one fateful day.
It happened that I was at Gary’s house on a Saturday evening when my phone rang. I was sobbing when the call came in so I reluctantly stretched my hand to reach for my phone.
One look at the number and I could tell it was a foreign number. My heart leaped immediately I saw the number because I felt deep down that it could be Gary calling. I took a deep breath and picked up the call afterwards.
“Hello” I greeted, “Hi Sonnie, this is Elle; Gary’s sister” the caller revealed. Immediately I heard Elle’s voice, I jumped up in excitement because I had been dying to reach her for a while now. “Elle, how are you? I have been trying to reach you on social media” I said in a hyped tone.
Before I could land with my sentence, Elle dropped a highly devastating news that shattered my whole heart. “Sonnie, Gary had an accident a month ago and has been in an intense care unit since then” she sadly revealed.
Immediately I heard the news, I almost dropped dead. Shocked and highly devastated, I screamed “What!”.
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