By Excelrymez
A.K.A: Mummy E

Episode 1

Me: Please am very sorry, its not what you think baby

Biola: What do you mean its not what i think? You think am a fool

Me:Am very sorry baby

Biola: Keep your sorry to yourself, Its all over

Me: ‘’’’crying’’’’’’Ahhh…..please don’t do like that baby, don’t let it be over..i never meant to hurt you baby..remember we have come a long way to let it be over right now

Biola:you never meant to hurt me? Did i just hear you say that after you take me for a fool? You didn’t think about all the sacrifices we have made, you never thought of our plans….you never thought of what we have built together……Never thought you will do this again but i think its better it happened this way and i can easily say good bye right now before things get out of hand

Me: I understand how you feel baby

Biola: you don’t understand anytyn dear…u don’t..if you did, you wouldn’t have tried it in the first place……My dear, you can never be sorry for what you did intentionally……….

Me: believe me it wasn’t intentional baby…am very sorry, without you my life is nothing baby

Biola: Did you just say that? Please you need to take your leave right now or else i will embarrass you here now

Me: Please don’t do that baby..we can talk this over dear…please don’t throw all we built away

Biola: Whats it we built? The one you already threw away yoursef….mr man, please leave my house right now or i embarrass you which i know you wont like……’’shouting’’….snakie leave, i said you should leave right now….

Me: its okay… very sorry baby, please find a place in ur heart to forgive me baby

“Pushed me out and door slammed” ………………………Waoh, is this the end after 3years? I cant believe am losing everything within a month.


It was a bright Wednesday morning when i decided to make a trip down to LASU to process my transcript for onward forwarding to my employer. i left home as early as 7am and i got to Lasu around 7:45am, straight i went to Faculty of Management Sciences(FMS) which was my faculty where i graduated from. The faculty premises has changed a bit as there was new structure behind FMS which i learnt is being use for lectures and also a new structure directly opposite FMS which they said is social science faculty.

School was scanty as there was no much activities, the campus marshal were in front of the faculty entrance, i greeted them and made my way to the first floor which was the faculty office but to my dismay, the offices were still locked. The first thing that came to my mind was “this civil servant sha, they are not in the office by this time, when will they come now”…….

I met a tall fair lady around the corridor and greeted her…..

Me: Good Morning….

Lady: Good Morning……

Me: Please when do you think this people will be around

Lady: Sincerely, i don’t know… also waiting for them

Me: datz serious………civil servant are always enjoying…coming late to office most times

Lady: Abi…..

Me: Thanks….

Lady: You welcome…………………

]I went downstairs to look around and do some sightseeing as the school premises has really changed from the way it was when i graduated from the school..Apparently the state government and the school management have been pumping lots of money to the school in terms of infrastructural development.

I walked to the canteen to put something in my stomach and relax a bit till around 8:30 before i decided to check back at the faculty office. Luckily for me, the office was opened and i met a man and a lady there…..

Me: Good morning Sir….

Man: Morning……

Me: please i want to find out about the process of obtaining my transcript……

Man: Ohk…did you finish from this faculty?

Me: Yes Sir…..

Man: Transcript is not process from the faculty office…you will need to go to the ICT centre (Exam and Records Department for the processing)

Me: Ohk…..please where is that sir?

Man: The building is directly opposite MBA hall…do u know MBA?

Me: I guess i know Sir

Man: Just directly opposite MBA building, you will see their building with a mast.

Me: Ohk Sir…thank you so much Sir

Man: You welcome…..

]I dashed out immediately and started thinking that i would have even be through with the processing if i had the right information before coming to the schooling instead of wasting time waiting for the faculty officer……..

I drove down to MBA and the building was so easy to identify…i walked in and made enquiry, which i was told i don’t even need to come to the school for processing my transcript as everything is now online and they don’t request manually again…..the lady that attended to me asked me to visit the school website to request for my transcript……………………….”waoh…..that means my journey to Lasu is a waste as i would have done this at the comfort of my room”.

I walked out and started driving towards the second gate which i came in through….i burst out at iba road and turn back going to Igando….turning back to directly opposite the school gate, standing there was the lady i met at the corridor of the faculty office earlier….waoh, i never got the opportunity to see her physique when we had the conversation then as she rested her a-s somewhere and her hand over her chest with her bag then…..i parked and horn for her

Me: hello……

Lady: Hi

Me: where are you heading to?

Lady: Iyana Ipaja side……

Me: Ohhhh…am going towards egbeda…maybe i can help u a little

Lady: thank so much Sir……..

She hopped in and we started going…………….After a while

Me: Please whats the name if i may ask

Lady: Am Mary….

Me: Am snakie……Its nice meeting you mary

Mary: the pleasure is mine

Me: Is today lecture free or you don’t have class today?

Mary: Dunno..guess they said, students are not in school as non academic staff are on strike

Me: strike ke? What happened?

Mary: i don’t know oooooo………

Me: Are you not a student of the school

Mary: I graduated 2012………….

Me: Ohh… very sorry……

Mary: I only came to make enquiry about my certificate……

Me: hope you got the right response

Mary: yes..they said i will need to provide some documents in order to collect my certificate

Me: that should be your clearance and some documents

Mary: yes….

Me: that means they have not change the process then……i graduated in 2008

Mary: Ohk……….

]Me: so, what are you into now?

Mary: nothing really..i just finished my service 4 months ago, so am still an applicant

Me: hey yah…..God will definitely do it for you dear..its not so easy getting a job in this country..hope you have been applying for jobs sha.

Mary: Yeah…have been giving my CV out to people but its been promise and promise but am hopeful sha

Me: its not so easy like that, you know the people you give your cv to also have other people that are hanging on their neck…dont be discourage dear…..when its your time, your helper will surely locate you by his grace.

Mary: amen oooo…thanks so much…..what do you do

Me: I work with a consulting firm……..

Mary: Ohk……maybe i will also give you my CV

Me: No problem…..but do you have a copy here?

Mary: I don’t but i wouldn’t mind getting your details so that i can forward it to you.

Me: No problem, thats my email and phone number is there, you can forward it to my mail

Mary: Ohk sir…am doing that right away………

Me: Oh….you even have it handy…..

Mary: Yes now……..

Me: U no dey even joke at all….flash me with your number so i can also save it on my fone

Mary: ohk…joke ke? Am seriously searching for work oo…am tired of staying at home

Me: On a more serious note..a beautiful lady like you shouldn’t search for work so long like this now cos no interviewer will see you and wouldn’t want to give you a job straight away

Mary: I pray its by that ooo…………….

Me: Yes now…….if i ever interview someone like you, believe me you av gotten the job already cos this your beauty is enchanting

Mary: I hear u….no be by beauty jare..rather wat u have upstairs…..moreover, thanks for flattering me

Me: what do u mean now….how will i be flattering you..sincerely, its been a while i set my eyes on a beauty like you……….God completed everything in you.

Mary: Lolzzzz…….Okunrin sha…all of you are the same thing

Me: same thing as how?

Mary: what do u mean by God completed everything in me………

Me: Yes now…..You aint too tall or short…….every part of ur body is perfect…including ********sorry am not suppose to mention that

Mary: Including what? You are free now…anything you say, it wont be the first time i will be hearing it and it wont be the last time……so you better pour out all you have on ur mind before it started causing headache for you.

Me: lolzzz……..that kind one dey cause headache…

Mary: Yes of course

Me: well some things are better left unsaid sha cos you don’t know what you will say that you wont be able to say another one again

Mary: lolzzz……datz very funny…have u ever said one before that landed you in trouble

Me: yes now but it was my friend

Mary: ehn ehn…..what happened to him

Me: He saw a lady at a party we went to last week and was complementing her without knowing that the lady was a fiancée of a Colonel…the lady was enjoying my guy too and dey were rocking each other before the young colonel came and my guy thought it was just ordinary took maturity before we were able to settle it….

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