THE UNROMANTIC US : EPISODE 1 – THE END

THE UNROMANTIC US : EPISODE 1 – THE END

Episode 2

Why did she push you away? The presenter asked trying not to laugh.

She said she don’t like that because she just finished praying. Ayomi said smiling broadly.

I’ve heard about some people who refuse sex when they are fasting, is it an act of sin sir? The presenter asked.

Absolutely no! So far you’re legally married to him or her. Fasting does not stop you from being intimate with your partner. Ayomi explained.

So after that, how was the journey? The presenter questioned.

Hmm! My love, she was indeed hard to ground.. Ayomi said staring into the space.

Ifemi, please na. It’s being three months we’ve got married but you haven’t allow me touch you. Ayomi pleaded on his knees.

I heard the thing is painful and plus I don’t want it now! She yelled.

Ah! But you heard it when the pastor said” and the two shall become one flesh” Ifemi, what you are doing is unfair o. Ayomi said as he maned enough not to cry.

Hanhan! Bro Ayo, I don’t know you are this carnal o. So because of ordinary sx, you’re begging me on your two knees. Ifemi said sarcastically.

See, you’re now my wife and not just a lady to me anymore, don’t you get that? Ayomi asked angrily.

So, you want to beat me over this? She asked as she took my hands off her angrily.

That’s not what I mean Ifemi, Ayomi said calmly as he tried to hide his anger.

So, what do you mean? I even thought you were spiritual, I don’t know you are a sx add.ict! She snapped as Ayomi loose it.

And because I’m a minister, does that mean I don’t have sex urge. What do you think is one of the reasons why I got married? You think I only went to prostrate over nothing? Hell no! And I don’t think this should be an issue. Ayomi snapped angrily standing on his feet.

So, you’re shouting at me because of this right? She asked crying.

Hanhan, who beat this one bayi? You were the one that made me loose it. I’m sorry Ifemi. Don’t worry, I won’t ask you again not until when you are ready. Ayomi quickly said comforting her.

Let me do this before she start telling people I’m not loving enough. But am I not? Ayomi asked.

Were you not? The presenter asked as Ayomi nodded negatively.

I was very and I’m still very loving and caring. I remember the day I got her a present.

Tada! See what we have here. Ayomi said excitedly showing his wife the few clothes and shoes he got her.

Jesus Christ! Who is going to wear all this jezebelic dress you bought? She asked throwing the clothes at her husband.

What’s wrong with these dress Ifemi? Ayomi asked as he checked the clothes.

This will show my clea.vages if worn and this is too tight. I thought you said you’re a man of God? She asked rudely.

Ifemi na, which day will you stop all this your act? Ayomi asked sadly.

The day you stop treating me like a pro$titute! She snapped.

For God’s sake my love, these are just clothes you can wear when it’s just the two of us. You put on dress that are meant for occasion when in the bedroom, who on earth does that? Ayomi asked soberly.

That’s how best I know how to do my thing. Besides, I have to abstain from all appearance of evil. She said defensively.

Appearance of evil? Tell me my dear wife, is there any evil in what I’ve got you? Ayomi asked as Ifemi dodged his stare.

See, you have to wake up from this your old school way of life. No one uses scarf outside church more these days, and even if you have to. Tie it nearly and smartly not all these aunty Mary’s style.

It’s okay! I don’t just like them. I might defile my garment. Ifemi said rather remorseful this time.

Argh! There you go again… Ayomi said heading for the kitchen.

Bro Ayomide, I’ve not cook what we’re going to eat tonight. She said approaching the kitchen.

And why is that? Ayomi asked shutting his eyes as he tried not to get angry.

I heard a prayer today and it took long before I noticed the time has gone. She said as she rushed in to make something.

Ayomi reached for the used dishes which has been left unwashed by his wife.

I forgot to clean those too! She said as Ayomi gave her a cold look.

I don’t know why she do use the things of the spirit to affect the physical. Ayomi thought as he arranged the dishes.

I will be upstairs. He said coldly.

Ok bro Ayo. She said.

Haba! How many times have I told you to stop calling me that? Ayomi asked holding the knob.

I’m not your elderly brother neither am I a younger one. Enough of all this bro Ayo this and that. He said as he stormed out of the kitchen.

Laughs! Such a weird thing to do in this dispensation! The presenter said as Ayomi smiled.

Abi, she was just too crude as at that time. There was a day she called me that in my sister’s present.

Brother Ayo! The food is ready.

Hmm? Brother? Why are you calling him that? Ayomi’s sister asked confused.

Oh! It was a slip of tongue. She said as Ayomi chuckled.

Ifemi, we’ll be with you in a moment. He said as his sister clapped.

Ehnehn, you can even call him Ayomi if you can’t think of any let name for now. She said as Ifemi tried to smile.

Ayomi laughed reading the expression on his wife’s face.

She might not like it! Ayomi said teasingly as Ifemide smirked.

So, the change began from there? The presenter.

Yes, even if it was awkward.

THE UNROMANTIC US : EPISODE 1 – THE END

Six months into the marriage, the relatives start calling if anything has happened but our response was, God will do it. Even without us doing anything.

Ife, see I don’t want you to be stressed about this pregnancy thing, when it’s time God will surely do it. Ayomide’s mum said during one of her visiting day.

Amen ma. She answered as Ayomi stared at her.

Alright then, I will take my leave now. She said

Safe journey ma. I will come visiting one of these days too. She said as Ayomi’s mum looked at her.

You! Better stay here ‘ cause I know that a joke. She said playfully.

I will surprise you this time around ma. She said as she escort her.

Why can’t you tell her you’re still a vrgin? Ayomi snapped as Ifemide returned to the house.

I only pray it won’t be too late for you too realise that what you’re doing is bad. Ayomi said as he went upstairs.

I even want to tell you that my sister will be coming here. She said from behind as Ayomi turned.

Suit yourself! He snapped.

THE UNROMANTIC US : EPISODE 1 – THE END

AFTER 2 DAYS

Tada! I’m here! Ewadara announced her presence.

Eeh! My baby in-law is here. Ayomi said as he stood to welcome her.

Bro Ayomi, how have you been? She greeted hugging him.

I’m fine baby sis. How is school? He asked as they settled down.

School is fine. Where is my sister? She asked checking around.

Oh! She went out just now.

I hope you guys have something I can eat o. Ewa said heading for the kitchen.

I guess there should be! Ayomi said helping her with her things.

I know my sister would have miss me! She said excitedly.

Maybe, I don’t think she do miss someone Sha.

Ah! Kele mean? She asked teasingly.

She might miss you though. Ayomi said trying to dodge the question.

Laughs! You don’t mean that. Ewa asked as she wouldn’t stop laughing.

I’m serious! That was how she rejected his proposal o, everyone was shocked including the groom himself. Ayomi said as he also laughed at what he said

Eeyah! Poor boy. Ewa said playfully as they both laughed.

Aunty mi! Ewa shouted on sighting her sister.

How are you? She asked coldly.

I’m fine! Ewa replied excitedly.

Aren’t you happy to see me, why this cold attitude? Ewa asked leaving her grip.

I am. Ifemi said trying to put on a smile.

Ayomi looked at her giving her a ” e dey your body” look.

So, why haven’t you called me since you arrived?

Huh! Don’t mind me jare! It’s bro Ayomi that has been cracking me up. Ewa said returning to sit beside him.

Ehnehn!

Hmm!

I will be in the kitchen. She said

So, bro Ayomi. What then happened? Ewa asked again leaning on her sister’s husband.

Hahaha! That was hilarious. She said laughing heartily as Ifemi watched them amazed.

I wonder what Ayomi is telling Ewa!

THE UNROMANTIC US : EPISODE 1 – THE END

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