Chapter 64

He talks about his mother a lot. I hate that we’re in hiding right now, because that means he can’t see her until the next hearing is over and Asa is hopefully behind bars again.

Of course, there’s a chance he’ll walk free again. But we don’t talk about that possibility.

“We’ll see her when this is all over. She’s going to love you for me.”

I smile, wondering what that’s like to have a mother who loves you. I start to think about my only family-Stephen-and then my smile fades.

Luke notices, because he runs the backs of his fingers over my cheek. “What’s wrong?”

I try to shake away his concern. “Just thinking about Stephen,” I say. “Hoping he’s safe during all this.”

Luke’s hand finds mine and he slides his fingers through it. “He’s safe, Sloan.

He has twenty-four hour security. You don’t have to worry about him, I made sure of it.”

I hate that Asa has put us in this situation. A situation where I can’t even see my brother.

Luke can’t even see his mother. We can’t leave this apartment. And we have to have security for anyone we love….


It isn’t right.

I hate Asa Jackson. I hate that I ever met him.

“I want Asa to pay, Luke,” I whisper, staring at his chest. I can’t look him in the eyes when I’m full of this much hatred.

“I want him to suffer in the worst possible way. And that makes me feel like such a terrible person.”

His lips meet my forehead, soft and gentle. “He deserves to go to prison for the rest of his life, Sloan. You shouldn’t feel guilty for wanting that.”

I pull back and make eye contact with him. “No, not that kind of revenge. Prison wouldn’t affect him like it would most people.

I want him to really hurt. I want him to see how much I love you.

I want him to be forced to realize that I love you and would pick you over him. It would cut him to his core.”

Contemplation flashes in Luke’s eyes as he stares down at me. “If that makes you a bad person, then we’re both evil.

Because I would give anything for him to have to suffer like that.”

It’s twisted, but his words make me smile. I guess when you’re pushed far enough, revenge becomes the only thing that could help you move on. That’s not healthy. I know that and I’m sure Luke knows that.

But knowing the difference between right and wrong doesn’t change the way you feel. It just makes you feel guiltier that you feel that way.

I tuck myself into him and press my head against his chest. “Sometimes,” I whisper. “I have these terrible thoughts…”

I stop speaking, because I’m not sure I should even say it out loud.

Luke’s lips meet the top of my head, his hand wraps around the nape of my neck and he says, “Tell me, Sloan.”

“You’ll think bad of me.”

“I could never.”

I close my eyes, not knowing what Luke will think of my confession.

But it feels good just getting it out-letting someone else know how much hatred I’m harboring.

“Sometimes…I wish that just once, Asa would have to watch you fk me.


Click 5 below to continue reading